2010 is almost here. I would be lying if I said I wasn't ready for 2009 to end. The last 5 months have been rough on me.
I had an event happen that shook me to the core. I lost my best friend and the man I love only because of a Jezebel. (That's harsh, but it's true and that's how I feel). There wasn't any issues, so him leaving was a huge shock. I quickly learned how to be a single mom to a infant soon to be toddler. I am not going to lie and say this adjustment has been easy. Its been rough. But we managed to figure out a new schedule.
On a good note, Kara and I finally found a church home we could feel at home at. I love my new church family. I'm looking forward to what's going to happen as the church is starting the "Fresh Start Sunday" this weekend.
Happy New Year Everyone!
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Friday, December 25, 2009
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Teach the Children
I have very limited access to a computer for personal use right now. I recieved this poem in an email and I just wanted to share it with everyone.
Teach the Children
Just a week before Christmas I had a visitor. I just finished the household chores for the night and was preparing to go to bed, when I heard a noise in the front of the house. I opened the door to the front room and, to my surprise, Santa himself stepped out from behind the Christmas tree. He placed a finger over his mouth so I would not cry out "What are you doing?" I started to ask. The words choked up in my throat, as I saw he had tears in his eyes. His usual jolly manor was gone. Gone was the eager boisterous soul we all know. He then answered me with a simple statement, "TEACH THE CHILDREN."
I was puzzled; what did he mean? He anticipated my question, and with one quick movement brought forth a miniature toy bag from behind the tree. As I stood there bewildered, Santa said, "Teach the children! Teach them the meaning of Christmas. The meaning that children now-a-day's have forgotten!"
Santa then reached in his bag and pulled out a FIR TREE and placed it before the mantle.
"Teach the children that the pure green color of the stately fir tree remains green all year around, depicting the everlasting hope of mankind. All the needles point heavenward, making it a symbol of man's thoughts toward heaven." He again reached into his bag and pulled out a brilliant STAR.
"Teach the children that the star was the heavenly sign of promises long ago. God promised a savior for the world, and the star was the sign of the fulfillment of that promise." He then reached in his bag and pulled out a CANDLE.
"Teach the children that the candle symbolizes that Christ is the light of the world, and when we see this great light we are reminded of He who displaced the darkness." Once again he reached into his bag and removed a WREATH and placed it on the tree.
"Teach the children that the wreath symbolizes the eternal nature of love. Real love never ceases. Love is one continuous round of affection." He then pulled out from his bag an ornament of HIMSELF.
"Teach the children that I, Santa Clause symbolize the generosity and good will we feel during the month of December." He reached in again and pulled out a HOLLY LEAF.
"Teach the children that the holly plant represents immortality. It represents the Crown of Thorns worn by our Savior. The red holly berries represent the blood shed by Him." Next he pulled out a GIFT from the bag and said, "Teach the children that God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son..." "Thanks be to God for His unspeakable gift. Teach the children that the Wise Men bowed before the Holy Babe and presented Him with gold, frankincense, and myrrh. "We should always give gifts in the same spirit as the Wise Men."
Santa reached in his bag and pulled out a CANDY CANE and hung it on the tree "Teach the children that the candy cane represents the shepherds crook. The crook on the shepherds' staff helps to bring back strayed sheep to the flock. The candy cane is the symbol that we are our brothers keeper."
He reached in again and pulled out an ANGEL. "Teach the children that it was the Angels that heralded in the glorious news of the Savior's birth. The angels sang Glory to God in the Highest, on earth peace, and good will toward men."
Suddenly I heard a soft twinkling sound, from his bag he pulled out a BELL. Teach the children that the lost sheep are found by the sound of the bell, it should bring man to the fold. The bell symbolizes guidance and return."
Santa looked back at the tree and was pleased. He looked back at me and I saw that the twinkle was back in his eyes. He said, "Teach the children the true meaning of Christmas, and to not put me in the center, for I am but a humble servant of the One That Is, and I bow down and worship Him, our Lord, our God."
Teach the Children
Just a week before Christmas I had a visitor. I just finished the household chores for the night and was preparing to go to bed, when I heard a noise in the front of the house. I opened the door to the front room and, to my surprise, Santa himself stepped out from behind the Christmas tree. He placed a finger over his mouth so I would not cry out "What are you doing?" I started to ask. The words choked up in my throat, as I saw he had tears in his eyes. His usual jolly manor was gone. Gone was the eager boisterous soul we all know. He then answered me with a simple statement, "TEACH THE CHILDREN."
I was puzzled; what did he mean? He anticipated my question, and with one quick movement brought forth a miniature toy bag from behind the tree. As I stood there bewildered, Santa said, "Teach the children! Teach them the meaning of Christmas. The meaning that children now-a-day's have forgotten!"
Santa then reached in his bag and pulled out a FIR TREE and placed it before the mantle.
"Teach the children that the pure green color of the stately fir tree remains green all year around, depicting the everlasting hope of mankind. All the needles point heavenward, making it a symbol of man's thoughts toward heaven." He again reached into his bag and pulled out a brilliant STAR.
"Teach the children that the star was the heavenly sign of promises long ago. God promised a savior for the world, and the star was the sign of the fulfillment of that promise." He then reached in his bag and pulled out a CANDLE.
"Teach the children that the candle symbolizes that Christ is the light of the world, and when we see this great light we are reminded of He who displaced the darkness." Once again he reached into his bag and removed a WREATH and placed it on the tree.
"Teach the children that the wreath symbolizes the eternal nature of love. Real love never ceases. Love is one continuous round of affection." He then pulled out from his bag an ornament of HIMSELF.
"Teach the children that I, Santa Clause symbolize the generosity and good will we feel during the month of December." He reached in again and pulled out a HOLLY LEAF.
"Teach the children that the holly plant represents immortality. It represents the Crown of Thorns worn by our Savior. The red holly berries represent the blood shed by Him." Next he pulled out a GIFT from the bag and said, "Teach the children that God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son..." "Thanks be to God for His unspeakable gift. Teach the children that the Wise Men bowed before the Holy Babe and presented Him with gold, frankincense, and myrrh. "We should always give gifts in the same spirit as the Wise Men."
Santa reached in his bag and pulled out a CANDY CANE and hung it on the tree "Teach the children that the candy cane represents the shepherds crook. The crook on the shepherds' staff helps to bring back strayed sheep to the flock. The candy cane is the symbol that we are our brothers keeper."
He reached in again and pulled out an ANGEL. "Teach the children that it was the Angels that heralded in the glorious news of the Savior's birth. The angels sang Glory to God in the Highest, on earth peace, and good will toward men."
Suddenly I heard a soft twinkling sound, from his bag he pulled out a BELL. Teach the children that the lost sheep are found by the sound of the bell, it should bring man to the fold. The bell symbolizes guidance and return."
Santa looked back at the tree and was pleased. He looked back at me and I saw that the twinkle was back in his eyes. He said, "Teach the children the true meaning of Christmas, and to not put me in the center, for I am but a humble servant of the One That Is, and I bow down and worship Him, our Lord, our God."
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Kara~15 Months
Well, little miss turned 15 months 3 days ago.
She is beginning to love books. I have to be careful and "hide" the grown up books. She loves her board books. She is talking more gibberish than actual words. At least she is vocal. She recognizes items in her books. If I ask her to show the me shoe, she points to it.
She has started the picky eater club. She used to love cheese toast, now she just wants the toast with no cheese. She peels the cheese off and it ends up on the floor. The only meat she likes is breaded chicken tenders. She recently discovered how to dip food in condiments. That has been a real adventure. For some reason when she is with her dad ketchup or whatever she is dipping food in ends up all over her clothes. I don't want to nag him, but I really wish he would start pushing up her sleeves or not let her eat with her coat on.
She still isn't walking on her own. She pushes her walking toys around the living room. Sometimes she gets brave and lets go. Then if I make a big deal of her standing up alone, she falls down. I learned to act like I am not paying her any attention.
She had her 15 month check up and booster shots yesterday. She weighs 24 lbs and is 30 inches long. I don't the doctors office got her measurements right. If she is 30 inches long, she hasn't grown in 3 months.
She is beginning to love books. I have to be careful and "hide" the grown up books. She loves her board books. She is talking more gibberish than actual words. At least she is vocal. She recognizes items in her books. If I ask her to show the me shoe, she points to it.
She has started the picky eater club. She used to love cheese toast, now she just wants the toast with no cheese. She peels the cheese off and it ends up on the floor. The only meat she likes is breaded chicken tenders. She recently discovered how to dip food in condiments. That has been a real adventure. For some reason when she is with her dad ketchup or whatever she is dipping food in ends up all over her clothes. I don't want to nag him, but I really wish he would start pushing up her sleeves or not let her eat with her coat on.
She still isn't walking on her own. She pushes her walking toys around the living room. Sometimes she gets brave and lets go. Then if I make a big deal of her standing up alone, she falls down. I learned to act like I am not paying her any attention.
She had her 15 month check up and booster shots yesterday. She weighs 24 lbs and is 30 inches long. I don't the doctors office got her measurements right. If she is 30 inches long, she hasn't grown in 3 months.
Sunday, November 8, 2009
A church home
Finally after months of church searching, I finally found a place to call home.
Kara and I are proud members of a local baptist church in Randleman, NC.
I was a member in the past, and before some personal issues I loved it there. I worked in the nursery, sang in the chior and helped out anywhere I could.
I was going to talk to the pastor about becoming a member, but God had other plans in mind. After tonight's message an invitation was made for anyone to join that wanted to. Well, my heart started racing, I knew I couldn't ignore it. I went up front with another lady and we both joined.
I am so excited. I cannot wait to get involved and make brand new friends.
As soon as the new pastor gets settled and moved, we will be having a baby dedication for Kara.
Kara and I are proud members of a local baptist church in Randleman, NC.
I was a member in the past, and before some personal issues I loved it there. I worked in the nursery, sang in the chior and helped out anywhere I could.
I was going to talk to the pastor about becoming a member, but God had other plans in mind. After tonight's message an invitation was made for anyone to join that wanted to. Well, my heart started racing, I knew I couldn't ignore it. I went up front with another lady and we both joined.
I am so excited. I cannot wait to get involved and make brand new friends.
As soon as the new pastor gets settled and moved, we will be having a baby dedication for Kara.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Family reunion
I haven't posted in awhile because I haven't been in a very good place. I am struggling and I am hoping to keep my mind busy through the holidays.
Last Monday, my grandmother on my father's side passed away. We weren't that close because growing up my life was full of manipulation and verbal abuse from my grandmother and several other family members. I haven't seen her or my other family members for at least 7 or 8 years. The summer of 2000, I found out my youngest uncle had cancer and another health scare. I took him to his doctors at Duke every Friday for consults and chemo treatments. After he got his own mode of transportation, it seemed no one needed me or my brother around. Calls stopped, visits were far and inbetween. There are other instances. I can't type them out for family privacy. Needless, to say my brother and I felt used.
For the past year, my uncle has been in contact with me via Myspace and texting. We were supposed to go see my grandmother in Henderson, NC on the Saturday before Father's Day. Autumn's grandmother passed away and I felt my loyalties were with her since she was my step-daughter. Since then, no one could coordinate thier schedules to go see her. I regret not seeing her one last time. The last memory I have of her isn't a good one. She said something negative about my life and I proved her wrong last August.
My brother and I had very mixed feelings about making the trip to Youngsville for the memorial service. I really didn't want to face that family because I knew the aunts would treat us like dog poo (the nicest thing I could come up with). And, I was right. One of them told me, it hurt her feelings that I missed her 50th birthday party four years ago. The other never talked to me or Kara. My uncle talked to us before the rest of the family arrived. We felt we needed to go to pay our respects to our grandmother and I really wanted to see my father. We haven't seen him since 2001 or 2002, by his choice, not ours.
My father was so happy to see us. It was worth the pain and shame poured on us. He loves Kara and he kept saying how happy he is to be a grandpa and he is on cloud nine. He doesn't have a phone at home. He makes all his calls from work. He has our number. The ball is in his court to call us. Kara needs a grandpa and he needs his family.
The first picture is Kara and me with my dad, uncle and brother. The second picture is Kara with my dad.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)