Emotional Weekend

Last weekend, I went on a emotional rollercoaster. Tuesday afternoon Jeff and I found out Autumn's grandmother passed away. She was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer earlier this year (I want to say March). She was given a choice of treating the cancer with chemotherapy. If she chose this treatment she would have 6 months to live. If not, she would have 3 months. She was on her bed with her daughters laughing at a show on TV. They were laughing so hard she lost her breath. In giving my condolences to the family, I mentioned to them they were fortunate in not watching thier mother suffer to the end. She passed away laughing. I don't know about you, but that is they way I want to go.
Because the family is Catholic, they had a vigil on Friday night. I got teary eyed when I hugged Autumn's mom. The funeral was Saturday morning. Catholic funerals are different than what I am used to. The congregation sang, Holy Holy Holy, as the family walked in to take thier places. That is when I lost it. Before the song began, I felt goosebumps all over my body. As soon as I sang, Holy, Holy, Holy the tears started flowing. Before I knew it I was crying harder than the family. I cried through the entire service and on the way to our car. We didn't go to the burial. I don't know I would have handled it.
Jeff seems to think I cried that hard because it brought back memories of my grandfather's funeral a year ago. I have been thinking about this all week. I was crying for several reasons. The first reason, there are 3 young women who lost thier mother. I kept thinking how I would fell if my mom would do leave this earth today. I know I would be lost. Second, there were 4 grandchildren who lost thier loving grandmother. Two of which were under two years old. Those two children will never know how great of a woman thier grandmother was. The third and last reason, the Priest said a prayer asking for this woman to enter the gates of Heaven. I realize Catholics have a different beliefs than I do. I kept thinking to myself this family doesn't have the assurance they will see thier mother/grandmother again. If I only accomplish one thing in my life, I want my family to have the assurance they will see me again.

Sunday morning, Jeff wasn't working and was able to attend church with me and the girls. We really enjoyed the message that morning. I think we finally found a church to call ours. Jeff has mentioned to his manager he would like to be off every Sunday or at least most Sundays.

Jeff's ex-wife asked us to consider something. She would like for us to have legal custody of her second daughter in the event something should happen to her. She doesn't want her daughters to grow up without each other. Jeff is all for it. I on the other hand, cannot say "yes" right away. I need time to think about it. Please keep us in your thoughts in prayers for this decision.

To all the fathers out there

I hope each and every one of you enjoy your day! As for our house, we are going to church in the morning. The rest of the day we are going to be lazy.

Autumn's 5th Grade Graduation

On June 12th, Autumn graduated from the 5th grade. In August she will begin 6th grade. The best part (and she agrees with the next statement) is that she will not be going to the same middle school with most of her classmates. It took her all school year, but she now realizes she was mixed up in alot of the drama and causing all members of her family stress. She even told me she is happy she will be going to a new school with new people. I hate that she has to go through meeting new people all over again. At the same time, I am happy and hoping she makes better choices in friends this time.

Kara 10 months

Kara is 10 months old today. Just this weekend, she has learned so much. She started to wave at people when she sees them. If one of us goes outside, she crawls to the door to watch and clap. She grunts and points, when she recognizes her favorite snacks.

Kara also had her first visit in a church nursery. I was told she played the entire time and never made a fuss. I was so proud of her. That was the first time she was with people she wasn't familar with. I was afraid she would scream and cry when she realized I wasn't in the room with her.

Although, I hate to see her grow so fast I am looking forward to the future to see how she reacts to different environments.

Stolen photos

I am one of the many people who expose thier lives on social networking sites. I also put pictures of myself and my family on those sites. I never imagined anyone could steal or copy them to use. That was until I read and heard about a family whose family picture was used as an advertisement in Prague. She lives in St. Louis. The only way she found out was one of her college friends on Facebook drove by a store window and saw the same picture he recognized from her pictures. I can only wonder if my pictures make to a strangers folder or advertisement. How many people does this happen to?


For more details you can read Danielle's blog at http://www.extraordinarymommy.com/blog/.

Dreams and Watermelon part two

Yes, I ate watermelon before bed last night. No, I didn't have any crazy, off the wall dreams. Maybe it was just a fluke last week. Maybe since we didn't watch TV last night, my mind was clear of all the nonsense.
Last night we sat in the living room, listening to music and watching Kara push an old cell phone around the living room. The time we spent as a family felt like I was back in my teen years, sitting outside with my daddy listening and singing along with the radio on warm summer nights.

I miss those simplier days in life. The only worry I had was to make sure I had my daily chores done. Now, I have lots to worry about. I have a little girl that depends on me to show her right from wrong and how to survive in this crazy world. Which brings me to to request prayer, as I search for a church to go to. I left my home church due to conflict with the congregation. I felt it was time to go because I was no longer being fed there. I have been looking for a place that is good for me and my family. Keep us in your prayers as we look for a place to go.

Dreams and Watermelon

I love watermelon. Its one of those fruits that remind me its summertime. I only eat watermelon during the summer season. My favorite milkshake at Cook Out is the Watermelon milkshake. Its getting close to being on their menu for the month of July and August. We can hardy wait for it. There is one thing I heard about one of my favorites. I once heard if you eat watermelon before you to go bed, you will have strange dreams. I have found this to be true.

Thursday night, I had a dream that I lived in California and my best friends were Tori Spelling and Rebecca Romjin. I am not even sure if they are friends in real life. Back to my dream. All three of us were having playdates with Kara, the twins and Tori's two little ones. We were at the park. While the 5 kids were playing, a stranger walks up to the twins and takes Dolly right before our eyes. I woke up from the dream confused, wondering why I dream about Tori and Rebecca and how I knew the twins names when I only heard it once.

Friday night, I had a dream I was still living in California. This time I was friend with Ellen DeGeneres. She called me over to her house to talk her break up from Portia DeRossi. Again, I woke up confused since I really never catch Ellen on TV (I know they are still together, just in case anyone thought I was out of celebrity news).

I have been really thinking about why I would dream crazy dreams two nights in a row. The only conclusion was eating watermelon and then going to bed 30 min. later. Tonight, I am going to eat watermelon and see what kind of dreams I have. I will post sometime tomorrow with results of this study.